12th was probably the worst day i've ever had
not only i failed tp
i failed it badly with a magnificent 30 pts
kerb, failure to confirm safety
really
i dont know what i was thinking
or if i was even thinking
stupid mistakes

then after failing and reapplying for tp
i had like a thousand missed calls and smses
all asking me where I am, what time coming back, (insert) kp already
like pls
i went for a test, not like i went to geylang to find prostitutes
or anywhere else for that matter
cant you be a bit more understanding

felt like going to the mo and say
i'm feeling eff-ed up
and i have suicidal thoughts
cant sleep well
and my head hurts like hell
let me go.

and along the way i was like
telling myself
dont bash yourself up
try again next time
while the subconscious mind keeps slipping in
wtf. wtf. wtf. why. why. why.
internal demons

ja!